Episode #?: Monday, Sept 17

"Welcome to Red Eye, it's like animal planet but with more penetration."

guests: Anna David, John Ziegler, Mercedes Colwin, Kelli Zink, Griff Jenkins, Lynne Koplitz, Nikki Sixx

Intros:

If beauty were popcorn, I'd have her in a theater.

If legal expertise were a gavel, I'd bang her in a courtroom.

If scoops were champagne I'd pop him on special occasions.

If jokes were landfill, she'd be one hell of a dump.

If beauty were a forest, she would be a source of wood.

If brains were shuffleboard, I would do him on a cruise ship.

If beauty were a mattress, I’d flip her so she stays firm.

If jokes were English muffins, I’d fill her nooks and crannies with butter.