Episode #??: Thursday Sept 13

"Welcome to Red Eye, it's like The Nine, but in the shower it looks like the six."

guests: Julie Banderas, Michelle Collins, Ainsley Earhardt, Dawn Yanek, Jonathan Hoenig

intros:

If beauty were marshmallows, boy scouts would roast her over an open fire.

If brains were a lamp I'd turn him on every night.

She's funnier than Funky Winkerbean flashing the Family Circus.

If beauty were herbs I'd rub her on my meat.

If beauty were gray hair Bill Maher would be plucking her from his pelvis.

She's funnier than Luanne beating Cathy to death while a sad Fred Bassett looks on.

If beauty were a pumpkin I would carve her open and scoop out her insides.