so cute she's cuter than a pet turtle that has its own smaller pet turtle
so cute that if she were a Grey's Anatomy character she'd be McCutie
so cute she puts the cute in prosecutor
so cute nine out of ten manicurists agree that even her cuticles are cute
She's so cute she's cuter than a hello kitty lunchbox with a garfield thermos in it
she's cuter than a ziggy wall calendar
so cute she can't go anywhere without getting pulled over for unlawful cuteness
so cute she has to carry a permit
so cute that if she were a dinosaur she'd be a cute-ceratops (or a cute-osaurus rex). her best friend would be a cute-icorn.
so cute that cars in front of her should have bumper stickers that say "if you can read this, you're too cute"
so cute that her bathroom mirror has a warning that says "objects in mirror may appear cuter than they are"
so cute that when she flies internationally (or: when she goes through customs), she has to declare her cuteness.
once she smuggled it in a shampoo bottle!
so cute that if cuteness were pot, stoners would bake her into a brownie
so cute that hallmark tried to buy the rights to her image
so cute that in high school she was always getting busted for public displays of cuteness
so cute she's cuter than a forest of bonsai trees
so cute keebler elves made her their mascot
so cute her friends always let her go first in monopoly because how could you say no to someone that cute?
so cute she literally wrote the book on cuteness. it's called the book on cuteness and it started as her dissertation (grad school thesis)
so cute she's cuter than a gnome battling a thunderstorm with a cocktail umbrella
so cute she's cuter than a smurf using a cocktail umbrella
so cute she's cuter than an army of ants carrying something 40 times their weight
so cute she's cuter than an army of ants carrying something 40 times their weight... like a puppy!
so cute she was made the editor at large of cute weekly
so cute that spiders won't even bite her
so cute that if she gained a bunch of weight she'd still be really cute, just cute and pudgy/fat
So cute that she holds the Guinness World Book record for cuteness, beating out a baby seal and a miniature horse wearing tiny sneakers
So cute that she could say something horribly racist and you'd probably let it slide because she's so cute!
So cute that she when she sneezes it's as if she sprays a fine mist of cuteness all around her
She's so cute that if she invented a color, it'd be pink
She's so cute that even bitchy high school girls think she's cute
She's so cute that even cheerleaders think she's cute
She's so cute that zoologists tried to raise her by hand
She's so cute that zoologists tried to hand feed her
So cute that she's often called upon by members of the media to speak out on the topic of being cute, making her something of a cute expert.
So cute that when she was a baby other babies around her stopped even trying to be cute, because what's the point, that's how cute she is
So cute she had to get her cuteness insured for five billion gazillion trillion dollars. Still not enough, if you ask me.
So cute she could have a parasite like ringworm or tapeworm and you'd still think she's cute
She's so cute that if she were walking an adorable puppy down the street people would stop the puppy to play with her!
cuter than identical twins.... dressed identically!
so cute she could make a sandwich out of baby heads and you'd still think she's cute.
so cute she could wear a coat made of baby seals and Peta wouldn't even spray her with ketchup.
she's so cute her driver's license photo looks like a glamor shot
Cuter than the face a baby makes when dreaming about breastfeeding
Cuter than a baby dreaming about puppies wearing sweaters. And not just any puppies but labradoodles.
So cute if she were a healthy cereal it'd be called cute-nuts and people would probably sprinkle it on their yogurt
So cute she could stab you with a letter opener and even though it would hurt, you'd still think she's cute
So cute she can use the express lane at the grocery store even if she's buying more than 10 items and no one minds!
So cute people always let her cut in line. Especially at the free clinic where she does cute outreach.
So cute she could give away free carwashes and people would still give her money. She'd probably turn around and give it to ugly people, that's how cute she is.
So cute if you mixed her with nuts and raisins you could call it cute mix and four out of five campers (outdoors enthusiasts) would prefer it to trail mix!
she's cuter than a stable full of my pretty ponies
she's cuter than a canopy bed covered with kittens
she's cuter than a Barbie suitcase full of strawberry shortcake dolls
(could add: covered in the Little Mermaid's blood OR covered in pixie dust)
So cute she's cuter than the 12 Pillsbury dough boys and 16 ducklings
So cute she's cuter than Bambi
So cute she's cuter than Glomer, punky brewster's friend who lived at the end of a rainbow
So cute Care Bears commit hari kari around her
So cute she doesn't even have to dot her I's with hearts or draw smiley faces in her o's
so cute she makes babies look like trolls
so cute she makes puppies look like gremlins. not the cute ones, but the ugly green ones.
so cute she once dressed up as cupid for halloween and people thought she was dressed as herself
so cute she once dressed as cupid for halloween and people asked why she didn't dress up
so cute she makes muppet babies weep
so cute she goes confetti in her diaper
so cute she's cuter than Meg Ryan in You've Got Mail
so cute she's cuter than Meg Ryan, and everyone thinks she's cute
So cute she's cuter than a puppy tripping on its own ears
So cute she's cuter than basset hound tripping on its own ears
So cute that if she were to invent a toiletry it would be cute-tips. Sadly she'd probably get sued by Q-tips
Cuter than all four of the designing women
She's so cute that teenage girls get in trouble for writing her name on
So cute she's cuter than people posting pictures of their cats on the internet
So cute she's cuter than a little kid trying to pronounce a word and getting it totally wrong
So cute she's cuter than when the dogs eat spaghetti in the lady and the tramp
So cute she's cuter than the robot from Short Circuit
So cute she's cuter than a dog with a piece of confetti stuck to its nose
so cute that the franklin mint can't keep her limited edition collectors plate in stock
So cute that if she were one of the seven dwarfs she'd be cutie.
So cute that you might think she wears a cute suit but she doesn't, she's really that cute!
So cute that she tests positive for cuteness and doctors agree there's nothing they can do (doctors agree its terminal)
She's so cute that teenage girls get in trouble for doodling her on their keds
So cute she donates smiles to charity
So cute that old people leap out of wheelchairs to pinch her cheeks.
So cute that her cheeks are constantly sore from people trying to pinch them
So cute she’s cuter than a preemie that’s small enough to be cute but old enough to not be deformed
So cute she’s cuter than a brand new baby that’s small enough to be cute but old enough not to have a deformed head
So cute she’s cuter than a chicken pecking a song on a tiny piano
She's so cute when she was born the doctor said "congratulations, it's a-dorable!"
She's so cute she's cuter than a threeway between jem and the holograms, josie and the pussycats and rainbow brite
She's so cute she's cuter than a jem and the holograms sandwich dipped in josie and the pussycats gravy washed down with a refreshing glass of freshly squeezed rainbow brite
Cuter than a toddler pushing a puppy in a stroller
Cuter than tweetie bird and woodstock combined
Cuter than a photomontage of a labrador raising a litter of puppies but one of them is a duckling that also lives on the farm
Cuter than a kid saying the darnedest thing!
So cute that if they were to make a movie version of her life they'd probably have to get a chipmunk or a smurf to play her, that's how cute she is!
She's so cute that she could borrow your favorite album, probably We Sing Silly Songs, or Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul on audiobook, and never return it and you wouldn't even get mad.
Cuter than a bag of sleeping kittens left in the backseat of a car, but with the window cracked
Cuter than a pile of stillborns... I mean still lifes! A pile of paintings! She's cuter than paintings of fruit, which everyone knows are very cute!
Cuter than a bag full of sleeping kittens... Tied to a brick at the bottom of the ocean
Cuter than an omelet with bits of Wilbur and Babe in it!
She's so cute that if it turned out she were a serial killer her neighbors would be surprised and "[guest name]? But she was so cute"
She's so cute her neighbors are always knocking on her door asking to borrow a cup of cute.
She's so cute you might think she hatched from cute eggs.... if you didn't really understand where babies came from.
She might wash down the babyhead sandwich with a puppy smoothie. or a pina colada made of puppies.
so cute she's cuter than a pet turtle that has its own smaller pet turtle